- There are two blog prompts in this post. You must complete one of them by Sunday April 30th. You must complete the other by Sunday May 7th. You may do them in whichever order you choose.
Your job is to identify something that grinds your gears and explain why.
- Ice in milk
- seriously, who does that??? heathens
- No, but let’s be real, putting ice in milk sounds (and tastes) like an awful idea. Sure, it might keep the delicious ivory bovine secretion cold (for a while, that is), but what happens if you don’t drink the entire frothy cup of calcium-filled goodness right away? That’s right: the ice melts and you’re left with a liquidy cup of sadness and broken promises. Don’t drink broken promises: keep ice out of milk.
- Even more seriously: drinking anything watery (with exceptions for things deliberately watery, such as tea, because they’re intended to be that way and may actually taste bad if they are not watery) is incredibly disappointing and disgusting. There’s not enough flavor in the watery milk to be rewarding and delicious, and the drink is not flavorless enough to be plain water. It’s some sort of awful mix between the two, which is incredibly unfortunate for unsuspecting taste buds.
- “Okay,” you say, “big deal. I don’t really taste a difference. Are you sure you’re not just being picky?”
- Well, friend, you’re absolutely right: I am being picky. I’ve always been selective about the food I eat (though I have been branching out some in the past few years). If you’re a parent of a picky eater (or have a sibling who’s particular about food), then you might have heard the following idea on how to “cure” a picky eater: refuse to feed them anything else until they eat the thing they’re refusing. Once they’re hungry enough, they’ll eat it and see it’s not so bad, right? Wrong. I was the child who starved in the name of stubbornness and selective eating. (side note: that’s an awful way to teach kids to eat food. I was forced to eat carrots when I was younger in order to get dessert…I ate the carrots, promptly threw up, and refuse to eat carrots to this day.) Anyways, one of the things I do eat (or, rather, drink), is milk. I drink it every day with breakfast, lunch, dinner, and often in-between. As a result, I’m a bit of a milk snob. (that’s another thing that grinds my gears, calling someone with refined tastes a “____ snob.” Why are you looking down on someone who’s better than the average Joe at distinguishing certain tastes and quality in a certain food or drink?”) I prefer whole milk, but can make do with 2%, and avoid skim milk for several reasons, but mainly because it tastes watery compared to whole milk. So, putting ice in milk is even worse for me because 1) I have high standards and expectations for anything which passes through my digestive track, but especially so when it comes to milk, and 2) I’m picky, I can taste the difference, and I don’t like the slight alteration in taste brought on by ice cubes.
- Watery milk is unsettling to me in the way that watery soda is unsettling to other people.
- Protip: freeze milk instead of water to make special ice cubes which will keep your milk (or coffee, or tea, etc) cold without watering it down! 😉